Happy WTF Friday!

Normally I would try to find some darn crazy thing that happened and chat aimlessly about it for a while. Well, I don't have to do that today--I have had enought WTF in the past 2 days to write a book. Hey, speaking of books, I got my Yule present from my co-worker. I am oddly excited to read this book written in the 20s by a dude wandering through the west indies. In case you are wondering, I got him an erlenmeyer flask. These presents *sound* weird--but really, they have a point. :)

Anyway, onto Heather's WTF. So, remember about 6 months and 3 months ago when I didn't know if I got to stay...blah blah blah? Yeah, that just happened AGAIN. Totally got locked out of the refinery for a day. "What!?!" I hear you say, aghast, "but...". yup. But indeed. There are paperwork things...they all have acronyms of which I have no clue as to what they stand for, but holy heck are they important. The crux of the matter is the people who pay me weren't getting paid. So they weren't gonna pay me AND were going to take away my car.

All I can say as I look around shell shocked is what the cockedy cock? And then spend a lot of time wondering how I would get home...

Because I cannot control ANY of these things. I am going to drink tea. I am going to drink so much tea that my teeth float. Because people, what I can control, is how much tea I drink. *sip* ahhhh, refreshing.

Anywhoodle, I think the drama of the whole thing is over...they moved money from one acronym to another acronym because the budget of yet another acronym accounted for my existence. *shrugs*
Whatcha gonna do? Drink tea people, drink tea.

Whatever Wednesday-New Years Resolutions

So today I am going to talk about New Years resolutions, etc. I have never believed in them much, so per as usual I made about 20. My husband made one...and he finished it on New Years day at around 4PM. His resolution was to cut off all his hair. So now he's all good for the year and I am still wading through mine thinking--holy hell, I am screwed. But the one resolution to write here at least three times per week seems to be a good one--so here's hoping. ;)

Speaking of the husband, he is flying over the ocean winging his way towards Chicago today. Which, I'm not going to lie to you, blows. We spent the first week bickering and fighting as we (again) had to learn to live around each other and then by the time we settled down he had to leave again. So, anywhoodle, I'm a touch sad and lonely but I'm sure I will get sucked into work drama stress activities and have no more time for feelings. :)

Speaking of work; had a fun little mishap where my contract kind of expired at the end of the year and hadn't been renewed, and in theory I shouldn't have been able to come to work (this sounds familiar...) but I didn't find out until I was at work. *big sigh* Everything is all working out fine...just been a wee bit tense these days.

Folks, the turnaround, she be a comin'. And pretty much expect me to be writing bat crap crazy postings radomly because as you may or may not know working 7 days a week for super long shifts tends to make people a smidge wackadoo.

Anywhoodle,
that's about all for this wednesday.
hugs, love, and all that other crap.
-H.

Medical Monday...

So per my New Years Resolution to write more crap here ya go.
Happy Medical Monday--in theory this is where I comment upon some medical related news story.
I considered doing the Miracle Mom story and the sleep story: here is miracle mom:
Poor lady came in very pregnant. Had a heart attack and was technically dead...did an emergency c-section, the baby came out with difficulties. Mom's heartbeat came back. They got baby going and they are both doing very well. This is a freaking awesome story. (If I were a good blogger I would put a link in here or some damn thing but just google it if you want details) I love this story. Happily ever after at Yule-time...its fuzzy happy awesome. The part that made me apply my forehead to my desk in a repeated thumping manner is this: the doctors say they don't know how it happened.
Rokily Dokily. I call Shennigans!!! (Aka Bullshit)
I know how it happened. If you all take a second and think about it you will know how it happened. These doctors know how it happened too; they are just caught up in miracle madness.
I know what you're thinking: Miracles are cool. I am pro-miracle. What the heck is wrong with miracles you pinko commie pain in the ass?
However before any panties continue in a bunching manner here are some examples of the line I'm trying to draw:
Miracle: *you* see the face of *your* God on a potato chip. Mmmkay, cool. Enjoy. Think about it, meditate on it, show your friends and family if you must. In other words, rock on with your bad self.
Miracle Madness: people coming to worship your potato chip.
Miracle: *you* see the face of the Virgin Mary on an underpass in Chicago. You know, where the homeless pee? Great. Enjoy that moisture crack salt seepage--but do so privately.
Miracle Madness: encouraging your small child to kiss the place on the underpass (you know, where the homeless PEE?!?!) where according to the news report, some dude saw the Virgin Mary.
Anyway, I guess I want my miracles private and my doctors a little more stoic. Cripes, there was a whole other human inside this woman, maybe, just maybe, when they pulled that baby out it took some of the pressure off her system and allowed blood to flow, restarting the heart? Just a theory. Cripes, it *is* miraculous--and Gods bless them, I hope their family remains happy and healthy. I just don't want my doctors standing around, chewing on a thumb saying, "duh, yup. Thas'a miracle. Don't know how that there happened." And then shrug.
Nuh-uh. Not okay. ;)

So that's all for medical monday. Hope you enjoyed.
I am going to bed because a. I'm tired, b. there was a study done that said less sleep = depression, and c. well, hell, still tired.

Nighty Night!
-H.

2010!!!! Here's the new schedule. (wtf friday)

Sheesh, when you actually type the year 2010...wow,it feels *very* futuristic.

Anyway, I have figured out my new schedule for this blog. Obviously there are going to be exceptions to every rule but here is the plan:
Three entries per week; the current plans are obviously subject to change based upon my whims.
Monday will be Medical Monday--I have no set reason for making Mondays medical-y themed...but heck, why not?!
Wednesday will be Whatever I Want Wednesday.
Friday will be WTF Friday.

So, it's Friday; here is your WTF Friday entry.
I got nothing. Seriously, just scoured some news reports, stopping at my favorite news site (fark.com)and while I found many things what made me have a giggle there was no real moment of what. the. f***. *shrugs*
It's New Years Day and I have been in my pajamas all day. At one point I changed into new pajamas. Not exciting stuff, but honestly...not to bad either. My mother would be *horrified* at my lack of exciting-ness. She called me at about 1:30 AM this morning. I was, of course, in bed. So for any of you under the misconception that I am a "party animal" you should realize that this New Years Eve I partied more along the lines of an 85 year old. I blame it all on the fact I have a cold. *pout*.

Have a great weekend and a great start to the new year!
More interesting entry on Monday!
*hugs*
-H.

New Years, Work, and a whole lot of Wah!

Hey folks. I have a cold. It's not a particularly bad cold; just enough ickiness to put a damper on your day. Throat hurts, can only breathe out of one nostril...you know the deal. Between that and the fact that my face is bleeding like I have some sort of stigmata due to a new crop of acne which along with my new wrinkles makes me soooooo attractive. Yes, I know I am not supposed to pick. No, I don't seem to be able to stop. Yes, I know that is a problem. But hey, I am freakin' ROCKING the troll look.
What was I talking about; oh yeah. New Years. So, as most of you know it is going to be a Blue Moon on New Years Eve. Seriously. I think I may be afraid to go out. It's going to be amatuer night + werewolves. *shaking head* Current plans include going over to a friends with the husband and dogs and apply moderate amounts of alcohol. *shrugs* Whenever I plan big it ends up very disappointing, so this year, planning small.
New Years Resolution: to write in this thing more. I am currently averaging about once per week--but I am thinking of trying to up it to 3 times per week. Don't know, have some thoughts percolating and will keep ya'll updated.
As an important sidenote: Soon Come the turnaround. The FCC (refinery thingy) is going down and 1500 unprepared contractors are, as I type, prepping to descend upon this island (some are here; some will be here later). They will arrive and it will be like they have never seen rum nor women before. *shrugs* looking on the bright side I should get some great stories out of this.
On the Dooley front--he has gone home as of last night. Bless that big hearted bafoon, he did not fit into our pack very well. It was an experience and things like that always keep me from getting a puppy! :)
*big hugs*
Love,
H.

Almost a year...Happy Eve!

Can ya'll belive I have been down here for almost a year? Yeah, me either. Yet, here we are on Christmas Eve. A year ago today I was back in the midwest hanging out with family--spending a lot of time talking about my "year" in St. Croix. Lots of changes this year, changed companies...okay, so that was the biggest change but there are lots of little ones too. I now have a (psycho devil minion) cat. Have officially learned (thanks Doolie) that I do not want a 3rd dog, and lived a whole year without having actual tv. Please don't think I'm a saint; I have netflix and watch a lot of tv onlne...just saying, I don't have network tv. I have learned that netflix is one of the best services in the world, that I fit in pretty well on this island of misfit toys, and I have learned I like my own company. Having never lived alone before--well, it's kind of nice. I have a lot more patience these days; because when everything take HOURS you have to develop patience. The last thing that I have learned is you can develop a callous regarding the beauty of the world around you. Yes, I have a deck overlooking one of the most beautiful views ever; often I prefer to go see what netflix I have to watch. It's sad, and yet nice that I feel at home enough to ignore the beauty.
Alright, enough of the year in review. Doolie update: this little (GIANT) bugger is a pain in the patootie! We have developed a system to keep him downstairs at night. The other 2 dogs sleep upstairs and the cat? well, who knows what he does. Sometimes I wake up with him stealing my pillow; sometimes he goes and kills things. anyway, with Doolie downstairs at night he sleeps as opposed to playing "kill the kitten" under the bed all night. Doolie goes home in T-4 days. Not that I am counting. :) He is a very sweet dog; just trying to determine his place in the household.
Alrighty, that's about all. Come the new year I am going to continue this blog. Probably involving themes (reviews, guest blogging, photo thursday, etc.)
Oh, Plans for the holidays? sorry, you all seem to want to know. Here is the Heather's schedule of Holiday events:

December 24th -- slacky dinner with husband and neighbors. eaten outside on the deck. turkey, stuffing, potatoes, cranberry, veggies, and dessert.
December 25th -- slacky (possibly still in pjs) breakfast at a friends house with pretty much everyone I know. Then onto the beach for a day of sunshine and waves.

New Years? no idea--but I have a great outfit! ;)
January 2nd -- Adult parade at 11AM local time. *very* excited to see this. I arrived on the 2nd last year and caught some of the teardown...the outfits look amazing. This year you can watch it live on the internet. :)
http://www.stxfestival.com/
January 3rd -- Recovery; then back to work. :)

Happy Holidays Everyone!
-H.

Welp!

I say Welp! It's a fun combination of well and help. Here's the news: *I* am officially the bad neighbor. I know! Who knew? I mean, I've been the bad neighbor before...you know, when for a while I didn't believe in landscaping (drove my Chicago neighbor nuts) or hey, when I described my first neighbor in startling detail on this blog--probably not so neighborly then either.
But Doolie the beast from hell, well, he and his cat-search-play-jump shenanigans round the clock have officially prompted the OMG you suck email from the neighbor. And she is not wrong--I *do* suck.
Tonight there is going to be some exercise. Because otherwise I am screw-ed.

I'm gonna have to...

04:27: I lean into my dog Teak's head and whisper, "I'm going to have to kill him; and you're gonna have to help me hide the body."
And that's how my day started this morning.
Yesterday I had to get my phone replaced due to a water "incident". It wasn't even that dramatic or funny--just got some water on it...which apparently leaked thru the trackball and slowly but surely decimated my phone.
But back to the giant pain in my ass aka Doolie. My dog Life has completely given up on me as an owner and has been sleeping downstairs with what looks to be her middle pad extended upwards in my general direction. Teak the Faithful, well, he stays close but his face and flashing teeth very clearly tell Doolie is he unwelcome.
Greebo, f'n Greebo...well, he wants to give up no ground so he keeps attacking the foolish Doolie which only causes the (again) foolish one to get more excited and bang his idiot head into my bed more soundly Every Time.
(Reason #162 a kindle will never fully replace a book: you can't beat a dog with it--similar to Reason #1 (can't kill bugs) but different.)
Where was I? Oh yes, Doolie...so, I MacGyver'd a separation to keep him out of the bed loft...it involved stacked laundry baskets--that failed.
So we moved onto furniture And the laundry baskets-FAIL.
Then there was a hammock, a chair, and three laundry baskets-FAIL-although it did last just a bit longer.
So, for today--I give up. Hopefully with the addition of a baby gate and a prayer I can sleep tonight.
I would say goodnight; but let's be honest--time to make the donuts...
*sigh*

Oh. Meh. Gawd.

So, funny story. Or maybe just so tragic I think its funny?
I was complaining to my landlord about my ridiculous electric bill. Stating perhaps the hot water heater is causing my extreme cost.
So he gave me an on-demand gas hot water heater. In theory more efficient and I am all for it. Now here is where the crazy funny kicks in. My neighbors and I used to share a 6-gallon water heater; but now that is theirs alone.
Okay, cool.
I asked him, so now the electricity from the hot water heater is on their "grid"? He looks at me and says, "uh, no. But don't forget you get that $25 for their usage of it." This is the same as before the gas...
Oh. Okay. So wait. Not only do I now have to pay for additional gas for *my* hot water; but I get to pay for the neighbors' hot water too.
It wouldn't be so funny if it weren't so painful.

Re: holy. crap. I. am. tired.

Last night started out calm. So calm. So nice. Everyone chillin out.
Then, then it was time for bed. Which apparently in Dooley speak means hunt the cat hiding under the bed.
For 6 hours.
From approximately 8pm to 2am I heard the cat occasionally spit in anger at (poor) Dooley who was just existing with his head stuck halfway under my bed. Every angered spit from the cat caused the dog to jerk and wham his freakin' head into the bed.
To be more specific, he didn't do this for 6 hours straight. He occasionally took a break to hop onto the bed and step on my head. There was one memorable incident when he attempted to SIT on my head.
*sigh* I officially have marmaduke staying at my house.
This morning I woke up with Dooley asleep under my legs taking the complete head of the bed (I had long since turned around to get my face away from Dooley).
My cat is still mad. My dogs are still underwhelmed. I am *tired*.
That's all I have for night one; when Dooley visits. :)